How To Quit Your Job (Without Quitting Your Job)
“Maybe I should just quit my job.” I heard this from not one, but two executive coaching clients last week. Both are high achievers. Both love some aspects of their jobs but find others almost unbearable. And both have families to support, so quitting is not something they would do lightly. Joelle, a partner at a global consulting firm, loves working with clients and enjoys the substance of her work but finds the 24/7 responsiveness incompatible with being the parent and spouse that she wants to be. Meanwhile Boris, a senior strategist in a pharmaceutical company, is passionate about...
Read MoreWhen Should You Take No For an Answer?
This post first appeared on Forbes.com The consequences of overwork are evident in my coaching practice. In startups, established companies and nonprofits I see teams in a constant state of fire-fighting and leaders who are unable to prioritize, where the quality of work is suffering, individuals are experiencing stress and anxiety, and valuable people are burning out. In a previous post, I wrote about building the “no” muscle—learning to say “no” to certain activities in service of being able to say “yes” to the right things. But what if you say “no” and your colleagues won’t...
Read MoreOverworked? A People Pleaser’s Guide to Saying No
This post first appeared on Forbes.com “I have more work than I can possibly do, my team is stretched to the breaking point, and the requests keep coming,” said an executive coaching client in a large tech company, her eyes welling with tears. She was not the only one to whom I gave a tissue this week. Overwork is widespread in the U.S., and research indicates that it is bad for people’s health and productivity. An excessive workload can be caused by many different factors—a demanding organizational culture, poor planning, failure to delegate or a lack of adequate...
Read MoreYou can’t tell by looking at me …….
We all wear masks. They consist of the parts of ourselves that we gladly show to others – qualities, attributes, feelings, and experiences that we choose to reveal in a given setting. We also have parts of ourselves that we don’t talk about or show. Maybe because nobody asks. Or maybe because we don’t want others to see or know those parts – the parts of us that are vulnerable, sad, angry, broken, tender, imperfect, or just private. Maybe we don’t feel safe. Some of us are more comfortable showing vulnerability, some less. There is nothing inherently wrong with having a...
Read MoreFull Stop — What a Traffic Ticket Taught Me About Being at Rest
A while back I got a ticket in the mail for failing to stop at a red light. This New England girl had been caught on camera doing a “California rolling stop.” I was mortified, and upset at the steep fine. My husband was remarkably cool. Apparently he had noticed my tendency to roll through intersections and had been worried about it. “I’m just glad nobody got hurt,” he said. That made me feel even worse. You’d think I would learn my lesson, but I continued to tap-and-roll through intersections more often than not. So this week I recruited my children to help me “brake” my habit. They were...
Read MoreGoing Pro
If you read my last blog, you know that I am battling resistance. Today it has taken on many forms, from errands to housework to the season finale of “Smash.” And now it has gelled into writer’s block. I have several ideas, each of which has some merit, but none of which takes me past the opening sentence. I type. Backspace. Type. Backspace. My stomach is all bunched up, and I feel trapped. But at least I am in the chair, fingers on keys, right? According to Steven Pressfield, that is what it is to be a pro. The professional goes to work every day, whether or not she feels...
Read More